Image courtesy of KROMKRATHOG / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Below is a collection of various blog posts meant to encourage, inspire or educate. Grab a steaming mug of hot liquid this weekend and steal away to a quiet corner for some quick reads.
As I interact with people all over the country on the topics of foster care and adoption I find these issues of cost, worth and ultimate value to be significant ones – both for those who are already involved and those who are hesitantly considering it. It’s real in my own family as well as we continually learn to embrace it as a central component of who we are and what we do. We count the costs, consider the implications they will bring on our family and ultimately have to answer a very important question – Will it be worth it?
When we believe that our words don’t matter, humans start to express their needs through behavior. This is part of the universal experience of being human. If asking for something will surely get me a ‘no’ then why wouldn’t I just take it (if I believed I needed it?). Have you ever justified behavior by saying to yourself “asking forgiveness is easier than asking permission?” Sure- if you believed that using your words wouldn’t help you get what you need. I know we could spend hours debating what is a need vs. a want, particularly when your child is throwing a knock-down-drag-out tantrum at Wal-Mart because you aren’t buying them a new Barbie doll, but for the sake of argument, let’s just agree that sometimes our brain is confused about needs and wants. Sometimes a want feels like a need. Sometimes this is true even for us as adults. It’s true a LOT (maybe most of the time) for our kids who have experienced trauma and loss because they are largely operating out of the part of the brain that does not distinguish needs from wants.
But – the stress response was only ever meant to happen for brief periods of time. In the right doses, the cortisol (the stress hormone) that surges through the body in times of stress will help us to perform at our peak. When the cortisol is turned on and off quickly, it energises, enhances certain types of memory, and sets the immune system to go.