Image courtesy of KROMKRATHOG / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Below is a collection of various blog posts meant to encourage, inspire or educate. Grab a steaming mug of hot liquid this weekend and steal away to a quiet corner for some quick reads.
Most of my clients who have been adopted or placed in foster families have been abandoned by these families due to their behaviors, mental health challenges, and emotional barriers. So many families become burned out, overwhelmed, or simply disappointed (if they are honest) and cannot go any further with the child or adolescent who is emotionally chaotic and behaviorally threatening. As a result, many of these youngsters end up in the foster care system again. The search for a foster or adoptive family can take a very long time for children with mental or behavioral health challenges. A “failed adoption” or a situation where a child has been “returned to the system” can scar them forever. After meeting with thousands of kids who have been placed in similar situations, I recognized that the most beneficial treatment is often trauma informed care that permits these kids to create a trauma narrative (exploring their trauma at great length) and allowing them to explore and process how being adopted hurts them. These kids have expressed, with great forethought and insight, some of the thoughts and feelings below that we should all be aware of…
Students who have experienced trauma could be eligible for some of the same protections as students with disabilities based on the effects of that trauma, according to a ruling by a federal judge Tuesday.
And so, I am apologizing to our collective villages. You will be caught if the aftermath without being allowed access to an intimate view of why there even is an aftermath. Chances are you will hear bits and pieces and always wonder what in the world is really going on with us. Chances are just as strong that we will never tell the whole, real story. After all, it doesn’t belong to us alone and we have no right to share it in its entirety. Adoption takes so many sacrifices and it seems to me that we rarely acknowledge your loss, your hurt in this. We lose ourselves in this process more often than not. Cocooning is such a beautiful word that leads the imagination to visions of fluttering, beautiful butterflies. Our reality is often not the butterfly emerging from a cocoon. The closest truth to that is that we emerge, transformed into something that is the same and yet so incredibly different it cannot be recognized.