Navigating Manipulation

Photo courtesy of sylwiabartyzel /

Photo courtesy of sylwiabartyzel /

No one wants to be manipulated. In fact, it seems to be the cue for parents to dig their feet in and refuse to meet a need because of it. Let me ask these questions:

So what if your child is manipulating you?

Is that an excuse to not meet their needs?

How else will they learn anything different?

Manipulation is a maladaptive way of communicating needs. According to the TCU Institute for Child Development, everyone needs 4 things to be successful.

1. To FEEL safe.
2. To have VOICE.
3. To know their life has MEANING.
4. To know and feel they are PRECIOUS.

We need to get past our mental block of being manipulated and help our kids find their VOICE. That means once we figure out what we’re being manipulated for, we need to give our kids a chance to give good eyes and use good words to get it. Then we need to give it to them JOYFULLY.

By creating these new neural pathways, we will solve manipulation at it’s core.

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